Friday, January 26, 2018

Defender of Marriage
OBERGEFELL v. HODGES.
The two Questions:
(1) Does the Fourteenth Amendment require a state to license a marriage between two people of the same sex?
(2) Does the Fourteenth Amendment require a state to recognize a marriage between two people of the same sex that was legally licensed and performed in another state?
Case Conclusion:
The Fourteenth Amendment requires both marriage licensing and recognition for same-sex couples.
It was a 5-4 majority win for the same-sex marriage case of OBERGEFELL v. HODGES. “The Court held that the Due Process Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment guarantees the right to marry as one of the fundamental liberties it protects, and that analysis applies to same-sex couples as it does to opposite-sex couples.” Same sex marriage is also held to the right to marry because it is inherent to “the individual autonomy, it protects the most intimate association between two people, it safeguards children and families by according legal recognition to building a home and raising children, and it has historically been recognized as the keystone of social order.” The court also ordered that the first Amendment protects the right of religious organizations to their principles.
            Those Judges who argued for the constitution believe that the constitution does not address marriage for the rights of same-sex marriage. It is within their own state legislatures based on their electorates and the courts should not over step. They all argue that this is taking power from the legislature and putting into the judiciary. These judges agree that this matter should be up to the states on how they want to handle the same-sex marriage and traditional marriage. Judge Roberts argues that legal opening for marriage will make the change harder to accept. The constitution did nothing for the win of same sex marriages. Judge Scalia’s says,
“‘The nature of marriage is that, through its enduring bond, two persons together can find other freedoms, such as expression, intimacy, and spirituality,’” he quoted from the majority opinion before adding, “Really? Who ever thought that intimacy and spirituality [whatever that means] were freedoms? And if intimacy is, one would think Freedom of Intimacy is abridged rather than expanded by marriage. Ask the nearest hippie.”
And by Judge Alito, Jr.
“What [those arguing in favor of a constitutional right to same sex marriage] seek, therefore, is not the protection of a deeply rooted right but the recognition of a very new right, and they seek this innovation not from a legislative body elected by the people, but from unelected judges. Faced with such a request, judges have cause for both caution and humility.” Id., at ___ (slip op., at 7–8).  He talks about deep roots of our traditions.
            In my opinion, I believe these Judges are protecting the government, the constitution, and our deep roots of long traditions. Now people want to change it. They don’t feel that the Constitution covers the same sex opinion to marry. It should protect the traditions of our past. Why is this coming to the courts to change the laws of all the states when this should be an individual state issue. Let the voters decide.
            One day I heard a rumor that I had boyfriend with a guy on my swim team. I shrugged it off until after school during our swim practice and told them about the rumor going around and laughed about it. He laughed and said he started it because people were starting to wonder if he was gay. I asked if he was. He told me he was and was afraid that if the swim coach found out, he would get kicked off the swim team. I totally understood his problem because this was a new thing back in 2002. I let it go for a while but when it came to being asked to a dance. Everyone thought we were together and he was going with his “partner”. I realized It wasn’t right, I had “checked my religion at the door” for this lie to continue in order to save him but not myself. I told him I cared for him as a person but I didn’t support what he and his partner do and I could not hold on with that lie. He agreed and it started to come out that he was gay. He gained respect but also lost a lot of friends. His swim coach was okay with it but he did get a lot of problems from the other swim team crew. So, he unfortunately quit the swim team. We stayed friends until a few years ago, his Facebook page started to look a little too pornographic. I always ask myself, is it clean enough for my children to see my social media if they accidentally get on?  His page wasn’t clean enough for my children and I had to remove him. Its hard to stand up to someone about something that has become the “new normal” in society. It's like playing tug-a-war on our feelings. How do you deal with such feelings?


References:

Obergefell v. Hodges, 576 U.S. (2015). Supreme Court of the United States. https://www.supremecourt.gov/opinions/14pdf/14-556_3204.pdf

Saturday, January 20, 2018

What is your normal in your community? Does children or religion have anything to do with getting married?

What types of communities did you grow up in? Was it a single parent home, cohabitating parents, or a stable two-parent home?

The type of community I grew up in was like a bubble. I was raised with parents who loved each other and stayed together and they continue to stay together. My two-parent stable home was a normal thing in my world and the same for all of my friends. They all had parents that showed love for each other and continue to stay together. When I got older, like in high school, some of my newer friend’s parents were getting divorced or were already single. Cohabitating wasn’t really a thing until I reached College in the year 2004. For me, I started to hear more about couples cohabitating because their parents had a terrible divorce experience and they were scared it would happen to them.

According to Amato’s article he shares how important it is to have two parent roles in a child’s life. Even if you needed to get divorce because the marriage wasn’t very stable, it was important to remarry and in sync with your new spouse and share the same values and disciplines together towards the children. Over time, it will help the child or children gain trust and respect for the new parent in the home. What do you think? Do you have a step parent in your life that you could find respect for?

In the quote from President Kimball, he stated, “…only those who believe deeply and actively in the family will be able to preserve their families in the midst of the gathering evil around us.” Some specific types of things we can do to ensure we preserve our family in the midst of gathering evil, is to stick to the basics. The foundation of the gospel to any problem are these primary answers, read your scriptures, personally and with the family, say your prayers, personally, with spouse, and with the family, go to church and take the sacrament, let your children see that you pay tithing and fast offerings, and above all, let your children know you attend the temple with your spouse as often as you can. When your children are of age, start Family Home Evening (FHE).
 These are the things I have done and I can tell you as a testimony that if you stop these basics of scripture reading, prayer saying, and church going, life gets a little crazy and you will soon ask the questions what am I doing wrong? Life gets busy with work, children, homework, and other tragic events in our lives that we don’t put God first.
When we do that, we aren’t seeking the blessing that our Father in Heaven is waiting to give us as long as we do what he asks of to do. I know that if we do these things it will strengthen your family and personal life.

What is The church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints position on divorce? In the talk called
Divorce by Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the twelve Apostles he states:

“Bishops do not council members to divorce, but they can help members with the consequences of their decisions. Under the law of the Lord, a marriage, like a human life, is a precious, living thing. If our bodies are sick, we seek to heal them. We do not give up. While there is any prospect of life, we seek healing again and again. The same should be true of our marriages, and if we seek Him, the Lord will help us and heal us.
Latter-day Saint spouses should do all within their power to preserve their marriages. They should follow the marriage enrichment counsel in the First Presidency’s message in the April 2007 Ensign and Liahona.5 To avoid so-called “incompatibility,” they should be best friends, kind and considerate, sensitive to each other’s needs, always seeking to make each other happy. They should be partners in family finances, working together to regulate their desires for temporal things.”
When searching for a new companion, get to really know him/her and his/her family. Know if this person will work out for you. I know that people change during marriage and it isn’t easy to stick with that person when they have betrayed your trust. If it isn’t abuse, we can find away to repent and make it right. Like I mentioned above, go to the basics. My husband and I aren’t perfect and we have had some rough patches. I really thought we would get divorced at one point because I knew something wasn’t right but he wouldn’t open up to me. After a few years, I have had it and was about to leave with the children until one day, someone told me what was going on. Nothing serious, he was scared to share something he did wrong and needed to fix with a few people. Once it was fixed, we worked on our marriage and family. We continue to work at it. It isn’t perfect. I have been married 12 years and we’ve lasted this long because we put God first by praying, reading scriptures, going to church, and recently, attending the temple more often then normal. I noticed a big difference in our relationship since then. It takes time and work. Don’t give up!